Making Girls Run Since 1982

I am going to file this one under "Halo Stuff" because it is 100% lols.

Get this, a kid in Texas, managed to get his Dad a second credit card in his name and then go on a US$30,000 spending spree that ended up with him and his buddies playing Halo on a Xbox in a Hotel with two Hookers. Yep, one of my many ideas of a good time, however, one that would end with a dead hooker in the bathroom, and me running to Mexico.

From news.com.au which inturn nicked the story from money.co.uk:

A 13-year-old boy from Texas who stole his father's credit card and hired two prostitutes has been convicted of fraud.

Newark teenager Ralph Hardy confessed to ordering an extra credit card from his dad's existing credit card company and taking his pals on a US$30,000 spending spree, which culminated in them playing "Halo" on an Xbox with the hookers in a Texas motel.

The $1000-a-night prostitutes were released without charge but Ralph was given a three year community order upon his conviction on May 9.

Firstly, it gets better. Secondly, I would like to point out the fact the Bank didn't do a proper ID check. One would think that in order to obtain a second credit card, linked to a card that has a limit of atleast $30,000, a bank would atleast want you to visit the branch and supply them with your ID. Clearly this isn't the case.

After the hotel clerk alerted the cops after the kids asked where to hire some sluts, the kids told him that they just "won a World of Warcraft tournament" and wanted to relax. I would like to point out that Texas is not Korea where their sport stars are profesional computer gamers, and I am sure that the only money to made from WoW is spending all your time collecting ingame gold and selling it on the interwebs for real money, and that too is big in Asia. This clerk is stupid.

The delivery clerk called the police who arrived to find $3,000 in cash, electronic gadgets, an Xbox console and games, plus the two prostitutes.

Ralph reportedly told the oficers his dad wouldn't mind, because he'd turned 13 the previous week and he'd forgot to get him a present.

Ralph and Co. told the working girls they were people of restricted growth working with a traveling circus.

They added that State law did not allow discrimination against the disabled so they had no right to refuse them.

People of restricted growth working with a traveling circus? WTF? I guess its like when I tell customers that tell me to smile (I think they are just asking for me to smile, but it sounds like a order) that I can't due to a facial muscle disorder called Bell's Palsy and that I am quite sensitive about it. Truth is I don't feel like smiling, and reserch suggests those that "Fake smile"have a higher chance of having a heart attack. Plus you know that when I smile, it is 100% real. Hello ladies!

So anyway...

Explaining why he ordered two escorts, Ralph said he thought it was the done thing when you win a "World of Warcraft" contest.

The prostitutes ended up playing "Halo" with the kids instead of having sex with them.

The "done thing" for me would be getting pissed till I was blind, and that would be after a Halo contest, and wouldn't be for winning, as you see, I would be getting smashed while playing the game. I do this most weekends. Getting blind drunk while smack talking Americans down a peg or two. However the kids mistake was that they didn't have the sex with the whores, but then again, it might have saved their lives.

Video games reduces the spead of STDs!

Its Monday, and its time to try and have a regular Crazy Caption again. I think I have now got my format right. Post winners on a Sunday, post a new image on Monday. Simple. But will I keep to the format? Who knows.

So here is this weeks image.

Usual rules. Login/register to leave you caption in the comments. Winner gets 4 points, second place gets 3, thrid place gets 2, and the losers get 1 point. When there is a bonus round, the points go up by 1 for each bonus round.

If you have a picture for that you would like to see in Crazy Caption, email it to agenthambo at makinggirlsrun dot com and if I use it, you will get 10 points. Remember to submit your user name in the email.

Have fun!

What else can I say?

You may all know that I wasted my money on a Xbox 360, and bought into a dead technology after it died and bought a shit load of its content at really good price. Yep. I'm talking about HD-DVD again.

Well, I had been reading on the internets that the 360 also does normal DVDs in HD* aswell. However there are a couple of catches.

Catch one, you need a HD ready TV, check. It needs to have VGA or HDMI inputs, check. You also need a Xbox 360 that has either a VGA cable, or HDMI output. Nup. The latest Xboxes come with HDMI cause Microsoft finally noticed that people wanted that option, so for me, I have to go the VGA option.

What am I talking about? Well, the 360 will "Upscale" a standard DVD to HD resolutions (by the way of "guessing" what pixles go where) only if you use VGA or HDMI due to some clause in the DVD licence that the group of companies that deal with the DVD format has dictated.

Now the cable that came with my console (over two years ago) was a HD component that has a RRP of $49.95. However, because of the DVD forum's (I think thats the group) rules, I can't view DVD's in resolutions higher than 480p. However, for the price of a HD-DVD drive, I could buy a HD VGA cable that will let my 360 upscale my DVD's to my TV's native resoultion. Sweet!

But FUCKED if I am going to spend that amout of money on that. So enter Ebay.

I picked up a "generic" or "cheap knock-off" copy of the Offical cable from Hong Kong for less than AU$15, including postage. Now I don't like giving money to people that like to produce copies, however, I didn't want to waste a shitload of cash to not see a result.

Well. Spend that money people. Spend it with the visual joy that it will bring you. I got my cable last week, and fuck does it improve EVERYTHING that the 360 shits out its GPU. I have watched Back to the Future I and II and without the cable its of "meh" quality. With the cable... its of "WOW" quality. Not "OMFG THIS IS FUCKING AWESOME LIKE 300'S VISUALS" quality, but it is up there. Hell I have a few HD-DVD's that seem to be straight from the movie reel, including all the artifacts, and they look like the upscaled DVD.

So I guess, till Microsoft either ties up the fucking licence red tape here in Australia with the Video Marketplace, or brings out a Blu-ray player, the cheap knock-off VGA cable rocks.

I might do a new test with 300. I might hire the DVD version, and compair it to my HD copy. See how much it differs. If there is not much change in quality (which I think there would be heaps) then regular DVD will do just fine till Blu-ray comes down in price.

Currently I am watching my Gorillaz - Demon Days Live DVD in FHD (fake HD), and it looks amazing! As for games... well, I have to get used to the new colour output as black is now black, not washed out grey. However, the graphics are alot crisper. HDMI I can only assume is even better, shame my 360 can't do HDMI. Thats what happens when you buy a launch product (that is still going strong despite all the "MS suckz my xbox redringd" posts on the various forums).

The cheap knock-off VGA cable also has a optical output for those people that have surround sound systems that they want to hook up to their 360's for 5.1+ audio (the "+" is for those lucky asshole that have more than 5 speakers).

* The Hambo Benchmark for HD is Pores. That is if you can see the pores on the face of a person in a HD image, where in a SD image you can not, then it is HD. True HD, its not, but HD it is. True HD is where you can see the individual atoms that make up a person, while still being able to see the person in whole at the same time.

*UPDATE* Watching my TISM - White Albun DVD boxset now, and Saturday Night Paulsy is playing.

In Fake HD, it is OMG fucking Awesome! You would never know it was recorded onto DVD from a VHS tape.

Ok, its not the 11th yet, and this is not exactly a "Weekly update" so before anyone says anything about anything. Fuck off.

Monday was probably the worst day ever for driving to work. I normally hit the ring road round 6am to get to where I had to get going, and I thought I was having a good run, till I hit the wall of traffic at Sydney Rd. Normally the traffic here is running slow cause the Ring Road is droping down from 3 lanes to 2, plus then having a on ramp pissing 2 extra lanes of traffic now into 2 lanes (great design VicRoads, cunts.). However on Monday this wasn't the usual problem. About 5 minutes away (while travelling at 100km/h) a fucking truck had decided to jump the middle concrete devider in the middle of the road between the Tullamarine Interchange and Pascal Vale Rd.

The Fucker Trucker had managed to park his truck, loaded up with big fucking rolls of paper across 4 lanes. 2 on the city bound side, and 2 on the Greensbrough side. That section of road has 3 lanes each way, but the dick head cunt of a driver had managed to cut it down to 1. So as you can guess, he had traffic bottle-necked. According to reports, this was at 5am, so traffice had been banking up for atleast a hour and 15 minutes before I hit the back of it.

Not knowing what was going on, I turned the radio on.

Now that I think about it, I should have tuned into 3AW, but I was stuck listening to Gold 104. Fuck Grubby and Dee Dee piss me off. More Dee Dee. How the fuck that these unfunny cunts got a gig on radio is beyond me. Because Monday was the day after the Logies, I had to put up with Dee Dee saying that she never heard of Kate Richie, and never seen Home and Away. Fuck, where were you last year when she won?

Anyway, it was nearing 7am, and I hadn't get past Sydney Rd yet so I called my boss up to tell him I was going to be late only to find out that he was stuck in traffic too, and only a dozen or so cars ahead of me. Well that was some good news.

So to cut the story short, cause it was boring, I didn't get to work till just after 9am. 3 fucking hours almost to drive 5 fucking Kilometers! I could have walked that in less time.

As work was paying for me to travel there, I finished at the right time, and got paid to drive home.

Two things I learned from Monday. Number 1 is to listen to the radio for traffic reports. Number 2 is to visit VicRoads Travel Time Information page that displays the current traffic information for the major roads in Melbourne. Also, visiting the site on my phone while on the road is alot of help too cause you see, on Tuesday I hit another traffic jam on the way to work.

This time I was closer, and with the help on the VicRoads site, I managed to navigate a way off the Ring Road and to work, by passing the traffic jam.

The rest of the week was eventless. Wednesday, I slept in as I was near home that day. Thursday was back on the Ring Road, this time, getting all the traffic information I needed from the web, as I drove. Friday, I walked to work.

And today? Well I spent most of it stopping traffic in Liberty City, and killing the drivers of every truck I could find.

Next week I only have to deal with a small section of Ring Road, and its not a bad section either. Well at 6 in the morning, its a cake walk.

Ok, so again, I am late with the crazy caption. But before all you haters get all down on my face, let me explain.

Grand Theft Auto III! Go check that shit out, Playstation 2. Respect!

Ok now onto the winners from the previous round, and bonus round, so unlike the time it took me to judge them, will keep this post short.

You might remember the picture of the kid hopping into the back of his home in a car? Well this is the best that you could come up with.

Desci wins with 4 points for coming up with this cracker:

His dad preferred buying cans of Woodie and Horizons to petrol, so Jhaydynn was used to pushing them to school. He was the only grade four with Mega Guns.

Boogeyman scores 3 and a night in rehab for this one:

"Toyota releases the new Corolla Mullet - business down the front, party up the back."

Randomgit get the 2 points for using the words "Fucks" and "Ugly":

"Toyota releases the new Corolla Mullet - business down the front, party up the back."

Well done to the winners, enjoy your points, which can be used on items in the gift shop. Those that didn't win still walk away with 1 point.

Now the bonus round attacted everyone like a moth to something that moths get attracted to. It could have been the allure of the extra points, or just that the picture was easy. I don't know. I don't care. I just want to give out points. So the first 4 points, plus the extra bonus round point goes to mofo for:

Rick's decided to hit the bottle, again.

3 points, plus 1 bonus point goes to randomgit for mentioning "Shriaz" and "Hardcore", both words of the week brought to you by our sponsors:

Everyone thought Joe was hardcore, until they saw it was just a Shiraz.

Lastly, the 2 points and bonus 1 point, goes to eat my shorts for this:

According to ABS statistics, Australia's bogan population have been consuming more wine. It turns out they've discovered a whole new way of sampling those 'heady' notes of blackberry and oak.

Those that didn't win still don't walk away empty handed. You get 1 point, plus a bonus 1 point cause its is the bonus round. Sweet! It is great being a bunch of suckholes. Nice!

Now the standings are as follows:

Tune in soon when the next round starts. I am trying to organise something special for when I announce the next winners.

My good wife received something awesome in the mail yesterday. It wasn't money, fame or free boobs (damn!). It was a genuine paper printout of a 419 scam, from an actual scammer.

Don't believe me? Well here it is.

It's got all the classic hallmarks eh? You think they'd learn about these things by now.

Obviously this is targeted at old folks who don't keep up with the latest memes. The fact that it has a phone and fax number attached makes it all the more genuine to those with blunt wits.

I looked up the return address, it's a hotel in Spain. Plus it looks like it has been printed on a bubble jet. Come on guys, you aren't even trying.

But I am pleased that I now have a genuine artifact of one of the most well known and persistent internet phenomenon know to man. Printing off an email just doesn't cut it by comparison.

So what now? Well, You tell me on this here poll.

Oh look, would you belive that I havn't announced the winners of the last round or crazy caption yet? Well, if you read other posts, then you would know that I was being upgraded to ADSL 2+. Well it happened, about 5 times last week, or thats atleast what the fucking Indian Phone Monkeys at my ISP kept saying.

On the day I was due to be upgraded, I was. Excelent, then the next day I had no phone or DSL. YAY, a call to tech support was not helpful at all.

How many lights are on your modem? Try unpluging it, count to ten, then plug it back in.

Fuck that shit pisses me off, despite the fact I told them that I cant dial in or out, and that I had been upgraded to the new service. Eventually after getting someone who could help, they found a note in the system that I was being upgraded to newer equipment. This exchange was just upgraded, so WTF?

Then the next day, Telecunt fucked something up, and that took a couple of days to right. So now almost a week later, I am back with internets.

As I am fucking tired, I am going to post the winners tomorrow or something or, fuck it, I will give you all a bonus round. All entries will attract a extra point.

Enjoy.

All I can say is that I was into Root! before Tony Martin.

I win!